Wednesday, July 11, 2012

The Top Ten Reasons I Don't Need a Doctor to Diagnose Strep Throat

10.  My tonsils are the size of golf balls.  They create such an obstruction that it's difficult to breath, especially through my nose.

9.  I've stopped talking.

8.  I've stopped eating.

7.  It hurts to swallow, so much so that I try with all my might not to which only makes me swallow more because I can't stop thinking about it.  Don't swallow, don't swallow, don't swallow.  Ouch.

6. My body aches all the way out to my fingertips, even if I'm doing something as simple as running water over my skin.

5. It's over 100 degrees outside but I'm shivering under the covers.

4. The only thing that sounds good to eat are chocolate Creamies.

3. Sitting at the computer for ten minutes is exhausting.

2. I can't formulate complete thoughts.

1. I just know, okay.  So please swab me and get on with writing the prescription!

Don't worry.  I've got the prescription and am on the road to recovery.  I wish strep throat was like the chicken pox--you get it once and you're good forever.  If you don't get this sickness I am happy for you.  If you do, you have my utmost sympathy.  I think I've had it close to 25 times in my life, but never enough in the same year for someone to recommend removing my tonsils.  Lame.  Totally lame.

Here's to your good health!  And mine.

2 comments:

Rob & Emily Willardson Family said...

Oh that totally stinks! I used to get it 12+ times a year (or you can say, I never didn't have it). Anyway, when I was 18, they finally took out the good ol' tonsils, I've never had it again! I so feel your pain and I hope you get over it quickly!

Melissa Lemon said...

Thanks, Emily. Lucky girl without tonsils!